We can think we are attracted to something or someone yet all it could be is admiration. Yet the hormone-crazed and superficial ways that we have come accustomed to encourage us to experience what I affectionately refer to as pseudo-emotions. Nothing can really be trusted to be real any more where our world has become dependent on quick-fixes and "the next best thing".
I thought I liked you yet for all it's worth you just may be a nice person but not right for me at all... Therefore your idea to reject me is appreciated because you saved me from entering into something that I would have regretted. Perhaps it is merely physical attraction that draws me to you and everything else about you that is flawed, I have magically been able to cover up just because the idea of you seemed brilliant. You make me laugh which is something that I claimed to be attracted to yet there are countless individuals that make me laugh yet there is no reason I find to be so wildly enthralled by them. What is sad is that I hardly know you yet I, selfishly, expect you to entertain my girlish fantasies.
You're good and you're kind, you make me
laugh which I appreciate... You're gorgeous... But you can't be mine and that's
okay. I don't think I want to put you though that after I think about how I've
harassed you with attention since deciding that I liked you. I'm sorry because
I don't deserve you. I'm not a happy enough person to make anyone else happy.
I don't need to find anyone right now
nor do I think it wise for me to continue searching. I'll give up for now...
--J.
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