He smelt amazing. One thing I love about a man that smokes in secret is that he always has to smell good... Or smell like something other than smoke at least. It was that almost overbearing sweet, spicy smell of men's cologne that mingled with the burning smell of nicotine. It was intoxicating.
I only ever watched him smoke once. That was the day he kissed me for the first time. The big lofty curls of smoke that fumed from his mouth and nose, made him look even more like some untouchable deity that I was not worthy of even seeing. As he exhaled, he looked at me... with his bloodshot crazy eyes and he slowly winked at me. He was lying on his side on my bed. He wasn't wearing a shirt so I was looking elsewhere while my bedroom filled with sweet-smelling smoke. I raised my hand to my mouth and coughed quietly. He looked up from the cigarette, for the second time, and smiled mischievously as he watched me try to hide my distaste in his most beloved pass-time. He sat up and faced me. My back was pressed so far back into the headrest, I think I could've melted into it. Then he exhaled one more puff of smoke and began to move closer to me.
I don't know what happened to the rest of his cigarette... nor did I care at the time. His warm, muscular body was pressed up against mine as he gently held my head in his hands while our tongues explored one another. I could taste the smoke and I could feel the sensual burning in my body as every part of me set alight at his touch. When he moved back to admire his work, I lay there completely dazed and excited as I recalled each and every detail of the most recent of events. He smiled broadly again and then lay back on his side. I stared to see what he'd do next and I wondered what was running through his mind. As if he had heard my thoughts, he put my feelings in their place by reaching into his pocket and pulling out another cigarette.
He blew out a soft grey jet of smoke into the air and then closed his eyes for a moment. He took a deep drag of the second cigarette and then opened those crazy, bloodshot eyes...
And slowly winked at me.
--J.
